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Thursday, January 19, 2012

Stove by GE, kitchen by Satan

Now that we're considering buying this bundle of sticks I look at everything differently. That is to say, with a jaundiced and deeply prejudicial eye.
Note handles in lower left....still rubber banded. Sigh.
This is our kitchen. Designed by one of Satan's imps to fill a teeny corner of Hell. It is the sight of frequent bumping and cursing. Since the installation of a bazillion baby-proof latches, it is also the sight of me screaming at the drawers. When Baby Flails-a-lot grows up she's going to think "open, you bastard!" is a euphemism for drawer.

It has some good features, like this gigantic fuck-o stove. A lovely view of the backyard. On the negative side is crap cabinetry, darkness, limited counter space and what is possibly the worst tile job that has ever existed. Not only is it horrible and brown, but it's trimmed in wood! Who puts untreated wood trim in their kitchen? With brown grout? And someone installed the tile so poorly that not one single tile is level with another. Not one.
Those gaps aren't infestations of bacterial growth or anything.
Who needs the edging to actually join?
I like the house but general brokeness (thanks crap-tastic health insurance!) makes me wonder if I want to take on this ball of deferred maintenance with a side of overgrown yard and collapsing garage. I just gave birth to a huge financial responsibility last year and she doesn't need a giant wooden sibling.



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