Thursday, September 15, 2011

Why I want to stab Target in the eye

If you don't follow fashion, aren't into bargain hunting, or you live under a rock, you probably don't know Missoni just released a massive collection at Target. Missoni is an Italian fashion house famous for their patterns (did someone say zigzags? 'cause they never met one they didn't like) and fabric (they make their own). They are, and have always been, a family-run business, which is rare for fashion houses nowadays. You've probably seen the commercial where you were like "WTF is up with the competing bright-ass colors and geometric designs? I think I burned a cornea." That was Missoni for Target.

There's been a frenzy about Missoni coming to Target because their fashion costs thousands and Target only does pennies (by comparison). I like me some geometric patterns so I was stoked.

The big release was set for September 13th. My thinking was divided. I could go to the store and stand in line at 6am for an unholy scrum once the store opened... but I'm tired and that shit is kinda crazy. Or I could sit like a vulture at the computer and scavenge me a deal the second the product came online. In the end I decided to go for the online craziness even though it meant I'd probably end up returning half of what I bought.

Word on the street was Missoni was going live on at 9pm (midnight east coast time). I had Mother Magoo watching Baby Flails-a-lot and The Hub on notice that it was about to get buck-wild. At 8:55pm my body was flooded with adrenalin and I was poised for the high stakes, high speed battle that was about to commence. I was coordinating with Jazzybelle (aka Courtney of Courtneyoutloud) and we had one window for e-mail and one for Target. 9pm came and...nothing. No change. Five million refreshes and a series of panicked e-mails/web searches only showed that we got punked. Big time.

Booty-ass Target (hello, early 90's slang!) had lied. They apparently didn't know what the hell they were doing and were "loading" the site. The Missoni section would go live once they were done. Possibly 4am. Or 6am. Definitely by the time the stores opened. Maybe. The fucking morons had no idea what they were doing! This launch had been announced half a year ago and they hadn't set the site up ahead of time? Hello? New to computers, are you? I rearranged my whole day for nothing. Bastards.

As the adrenalin wears off I begin to get bitter. The Hub is off to a conference at 6am, so I figure I'll try then, but since it will probably sell out in under an hour (yes, people are that insane) not hopeful. Well, the gods of hyper-metabolism got The Hub up at 2am to empty the fridge. I hadn't been sleeping well so I got up too. Checked the site and the Target facebook page and whaddya know? Missoni hawks like myself had just that minute noted that one small portion of Target's mobile site was live and there were like 10 things you could order. Some of the best of the 400 items, in fact. Of course I jumped in like an all-star and got my order in. Blammo.

Thank god, because the website was fucked by morning. Basically they went live around 3am and were down almost instantly, only to be sporadically live the rest of the day. And it went down ugly because you could get on the site (as I did at 6am), fill your cart and then IT WOULDN'T LET YOU PAY FOR IT. You would get all the way to the end and they give you middle finger. It was like being personally insulted by Target. I wanted to smash my fist through my computer screen. After wishing a pox on all their houses I gave up.

Courtney actually battled the hordes and came up with some nice stuff for Baby Flails-a-lot and shoes for me (yay!). (Read Courtney's short but hilarious post on the shocking things he witnessed firsthand at the Target.) Eventually I got online and managed to snag some of their bags and cases. I didn't bitch-slap my way to Missoni greatness, but Courtney did.

I can't believe I thought this would be fun.
Grotesquely cute
Do you see the sparkles?!
 Baby caplet! She's gonna look like the zigzag superhero!
 For meeee


  1. Well, apparently I live under a rock with the guys from the Geico commercial, because I've been wondering what the heck you've been talking about with this Missoni business. And I love me some patterns and bright colors too! Those are *adorable*! I'll have to check out the boys' collection ... (Is there one?)

    Oh, and I'm spying on you. You have books ready to be picked up at the library.

  2. Whoa. I hope they get more stock, because something like this is basically exactly what I've been wanting to find for his crib:

  3. i love, love, love this shit. thanks for letting me know its there! capelet - WANT

  4. Doozee - Capelet is crazy cute! Totally didn't want it until I saw it in person. Quality was really good. Wow, Haikili, didn't even see the bumper set - ridiculously cute. I recommend both of you head over to facebook and look for person: "Locked out of Missoni for Target- FAIR Trade here" Two women created that persona so people could swap/buy items from each other for regular prices, not ebay inflated prices. I'm going to Orinda to pick up a candle next week.

  5. I was all tripped out about the library books - until I went to pick them up. Could my name have been more obvious on the library shelf?

  6. Yeah, it was pretty obvious -- jumped right out at me when I was checking out.

    And ack -- I realized late in the day yesterday that the nagging thing that I felt like I was forgetting all day was your garage sale! Hope it went well!

  7. Love Missoni! These sound like utter bargains!

    1. The baby stuff was definitely the best. Toddlerpants wore that onesie until was straining at the seams. It's never too late if you see something you like, I'm sure e-bay still has stuff knocking about. Thanks for stopping by.


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