Eventually he returns with a very self-satisfied air about him. I give the inquisitive eyebrow and he's says, "Grown ass men don't need no devil sticks!" The obvious response is to blink slowly because he has apparently lost his mind. But fear not, citizens! It is not a psychotic break, but JUSTICE at work!
The Hub had seen a grown man in a monkey suit walking down our street carrying devil sticks* that he just knew belonged to the kids two doors down. So what does my Superman do? He chases the man down and asks dude if he picked them up from the sidewalk, informs him that they belong to the children who live in the house, and confiscates them. It was a citizen's arrest of toys! He then returns them to the rightful owners and then rants to me for 15 minutes how he could understand how another kid could make that mistake, but what kind of professional adult thinks they need children's toys enough to STEAL them from outside the kid's damn house! I say nothing, because once while we were out walking I suggested we take two Razor scooters that some irresponsible rugrats had ditched on the sidewalk. Even I wouldn't have done it in a suit. In broad daylight. How tacky.
|*So that's what devil sticks are!|